Ways to Get Your Gifted Child's Attention

Does your child ignore you when you call? Do you have to repeat yourself over and over? Do you tell your child to get ready to go somewhere and then find that he or she is still in pajamas? Gifted kids often seem to be in their own little worlds. They can be so engrossed in an activity or thought that they seem to be unaware of the world around them. If this sounds like your child, you are no doubt frequently frustrated. However, there are three simple techniques you can use to help your child pay attention and keep you from getting frustrated.

Try touching your child lightly on the shoulder or arm as you call his or her name. The physical touch helps bring a gifted child who is engrossed in an activity or thought back to the world. Think of it as something of a bridge from the internal world your child is in and the outer world around him. Once back in the world, your child will find it easier to focus on what you are saying.

These are notices that help prepare your child mentally to move from one activity to another. For example, if you want your child to get ready for bed, don't wait until it's actually time to get ready for bed. Instead, start ten minutes or so sooner. Give the first notice and let your child know he or she has ten minutes left to finish the current activity or thought. You may need to make some physical contact with your child to make sure she hears you.

However, don't expect your child to be ready in ten more minutes, especially when you first start using this technique. You have to give another alert in another couple of minutes. And another alert in another couple of minutes. Don't wait until the ten minutes are up and expect him or her to be ready after just one alert. Part of the idea behind the alert system is to help children move from their mental world to the real world and keep them there.

If your child has a good sense of time, you might be able to use a timer to help your child keep track of time. For example, if you want to give your child ten more minutes for an activity, set a timer and let your child know that he or she has only ten minutes left to play, that when the alarm goes off, it is time to stop. If your child doesn't have a good sense of time, this technique might not work so well. However, it can be used in conjunction with the early alert system until your child develops a sense of time.

Sometimes parents are concerned when their children appear to be so deeply involved in their own little worlds. However, it is not really anything to be concerned about, unless it is a constant state. Usually, gifted children simply get caught up in their thoughts and lose track of what is going on around them. This is not necessarily a bad thing either. It suggests that they able to concentrate deeply on an activity. Being able to focus on an activity means that they may have reached a state of "flow."