Through the Years Child Development Guide Child Development Guide Overview Toddlers 1-Year-Old 2-Year-Old Discipline Advice Parenting Tips Preschoolers 3-Year-Old 4-Year-Old 5-Year-Old Discipline Advice Parenting Tips School-Age Kids 6-Year-Old 7-Year-Old 8-Year-Old 9-Year-Old Discipline Advice Parenting Tips Tweens 10-Year-Old 11-Year-Old 12-Year-Old Discipline Advice Parenting Tips Teens 13-Year-Old 14-Year-Old 15-Year-Old 16-Year-Old 17-Year-Old 18-Year-Old Discipline Advice Parenting Tips 11-Year-Old Child Development Milestones Your child’s growth and development at age 11 By Amy Morin, LCSW facebook twitter instagram Amy Morin, LCSW, is the Editor-in-Chief of Verywell Mind. She's also a psychotherapist, international bestselling author and host of the Mentally Strong People podcast. Learn about our editorial process Amy Morin, LCSW Medically reviewed by Medically reviewed by Joel Forman, MD on September 24, 2018 Joel Forman, MD, is a board-certified pediatrician and associate professor of pediatrics, environmental medicine, and public health at Mount Sinai School of Medicine. Learn about our Review Board Joel Forman, MD Updated on August 12, 2019 Print Table of Contents View All Table of Contents Physical Development Emotional Development Social Development Cognitive Development Other Milestones When to Be Concerned Next in Child Development Guide Development Milestones for your 12-Year-Old Child The tween years are upon you, and with them, some opportunities and challenges arise as a parent. Hanging out with your 11-year-old can be really fun as they’re starting to understand the world and converse like mini-adults. However, the intensity and the drama of a pre-teen—especially for girls—can be frustrating and difficult for a parent to handle. From the complex social dynamics at school to the physical changes that can confuse and embarrass a tween, here’s what to expect from an 11-year-old. Illustration by Emily Roberts, Verywell Physical Development Age 11 often means big physical changes. For girls, puberty might have already started; boys often enter it later (around age 12), but it’s not unheard of for boys to start it by 11. In 11-year-old girls, physical changes include increased body fat, beginning of breast enlargement, pubic hair growth, widening hips, underarm hair growth, oilier skin and hair, and the first menstrual period. Physical changes in boys might include larger muscles, vocal changes, oilier hair and skin, the beginning of underarm, facial and pubic hair, darkening scrotum, and testicle and penis growth. Tweens are beginning to grow into their new bodies, so there might be a little physical awkwardness as they adjust. Key Milestones Shows signs of pubertyShows improved handwriting and an improved ability to use a variety of toolsGrowth spurt and accompanying growth pains and cramps; the need to both sleep and eat more Parenting Tip You might start to smell unexpected odors from your child around this time. Sweat glands are starting to get active, so remind your kid about the importance of regular bathing and putting on deodorant every day. Emotional Development Get ready for a wild ride with the emotions of your 11-year-old. Once the child hits puberty, expect moodiness and a roller coaster of both distress and happiness. While many 11-year-olds still accept family beliefs and recognize adults as authority figures, this is also the time that they begin to question that authority and might have their first introduction to risky behaviors such as drinking, smoking, or self-harm. Key Milestones Develops better decision-making skillsBegins to question authority figuresStarts to resist physical affection from parents Parenting Tip Although 11-year-olds are starting to develop their own personality among a social group, they haven’t yet resisted the concept of “family time.” Make participation in family activities, such as going to church or dinner with grandparents, and responsibilities like chores part of the standard daily routine. Are My Teen's Mood Swings Normal? Social Development While friendship has long been important to your child, this time is when it becomes vital, for better and for worse. The idea of a "group identity" starts to play a role, and tight-knit cliques can form. Peer pressure starts to influence your child into doing things that they probably wouldn’t do on their own. Key Milestones Forms strong and complex friendshipsShows more interest in friends and less interest in familyExplores identity through hair, clothing, hobbies, and friends Parenting Tip Your child will begin to test boundaries and push back on rules (if they haven’t already) due to the influence of their friends. This is the time to pick your battles. Good grades and avoiding drugs, alcohol, and cigarettes are the battles you want to choose, while clothing and hairstyle choices can be a good way to give your tween some freedom. Cognitive Development Younger children tend to live in the moment and focus on what affects them right here and right now. Around age 11, they start to realize that the choices they make now could have longer-term effects. Eleven-year-olds are also beginning to realize that there are multiple ways to look at a piece of information, situation, or issue and start to understand that there is a gray area where there was previously only black and white. Speech & Language Any speech issues that appeared in a child’s past should be resolved by this time. If you still notice speech difficulties—the “r” sound is the most common to still linger from your child’s younger days—register for speech therapy to correct problems. Play At age 11, children begin to move past the playdates of their younger years into more typical teenage behavior at sleepovers or group outings to the movies. Their competitive spark continues to ignite, particularly in sports, as the pre-teen starts to dedicate more time and energy to particular hobbies. Key Milestones Understands that thoughts are privateExperiences a greater sense of responsibilityExhibits an increased attention span, but often rapid changing of interests Parenting Tip Students can begin to lose interest in school and learning around this age or in the next few years to come. Continue to engage their curiosity, and help make learning exciting. At the same time, resist overscheduling your tween. They need downtime, as well as time to focus on homework. Pick just a couple of activities together, and focus on commitment to those choices. Other Milestones Many 11-year-olds begin experiencing brain changes that help them transition into becoming more independent. Their still-developing frontal cortex and their need for acceptance, however, can lead to increased risk-taking behavior. Don’t be surprised if your 11-year-old makes some impulsive choices or poor decisions at times. While you don’t want to shrug it off and let them off the hook, understanding why you might be seeing some interesting behavior choices can help you better respond. If your child makes unhealthy decisions, create rules that focus on safety. Encourage them to think before they act and talk about the potential consequences of their behavior. When to Be Concerned Each child develops at a different pace, so milestones are meant more as guidelines as to what to expect rather than deadlines for shifts to occur. You don’t need to be overly worried if your 11-year-old isn’t displaying “typical” tween behavior, nor do you have to be concerned if puberty doesn’t begin during this year (if it doesn’t begin by age 14, then it’s time to talk to the doctor). You can be concerned, however, if you think that your pre-teen is falling into some dangerous patterns of behavior. Preventable injury is the leading cause of death for this age range, and parents have to contend with social media and inappropriate internet use. Strong enforcement of rules and setting reasonable limits will help contend with some of these parental problems. A Word From Verywell All kids develop at a slightly different pace. Kids who lack social and emotional maturity, however, may become targets for bullies or they may struggle with loneliness and isolation. It’s important to help your child sharpen their skills when you notice deficits. And if you’re concerned about potential developmental delays, talk to your child’s pediatrician. It’s important to address any problems now, before your child enters the teen years. Parent's Guide to Navigating the Tween Years Was this page helpful? Thanks for your feedback! Get expert tips to help your kids stay healthy and happy. Sign Up You're in! Thank you, {{form.email}}, for signing up. There was an error. Please try again. What are your concerns? Other Inaccurate Hard to Understand Submit Article Sources Verywell Family uses only high-quality sources, including peer-reviewed studies, to support the facts within our articles. Read our editorial process to learn more about how we fact-check and keep our content accurate, reliable, and trustworthy. 9- to 11-year-olds: Ages and stages of youth development. MSU Extension. Child Development. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.